socially_awkward_nerd

fatsexybitch:

yambits:

memewhore:

yourrfeelings:

as an overthinker i really need things made clear to me

lesbiantahani:

pickle-belly:

sundaycrossing:

Shoutout to that time this butterfly gave up his firstborn child to me as a reward for saving his wife

dragon-in-a-fez:

sagihairius:

i was taking this families order and the dad needed a second to decide so i was chatting with his kids and i was like “oooh are you guys twins” and then a voice from under the table went “YOURE CLOSE MAAM” then A THIRD KID popped up and did some karate moves at me and the dad just looked so tired

so yeah i met identical triplets today

this is the only correct way to handle being an identical triplet

one-for-all-plus-ultra:

claup777:

I admire people who do exercise with no music like you are putting your body in pain while being alone with your thoughts… that´s double torture

margauxawill:

gravywheels:

foxnewsfuckfest:

government-mandated-robo-gf:

fluoride-bomb:

sheepdippedmax:

impactings:

When I’m married someday I want to be so in love that our kids are disgusted

If your “loving” relationship disgusts your kids then you’ve probably caused them trama from exposing them to your toxic relationship with your SO that you’re now rekindling in front of their faces and they hate you for it

max they mean in the lighthearted “eeeeeew moom” way not like fucking in front of them

I genuinely cannot comprehend how they came up with that paragraph

How is this website free

It isn’t free. I pay dearly for every post

I pay dearly for every post.

queenciityconfidential:

przybyla:

queenciityconfidential:

The older I get the more I realize lying is a waste of energy, its better to tell everyone the truth and let them be mad about it while you have a clear conscious 

I thought this said living was a waste of energy and was like amen

That too

aoiultrapale:

I mean… tell me I’m wrong.